JUL.24

There are defining moments in the life of every parent. I have found that for me, these moments are not usually the major milestones. It is usually something so small and sweet that someone else would find trivial, but those are the times I love the most!

For example, last night I went into Lane's room to check on him before I went to sleep. He was laying on top of his blanket instead of under it, so I pulled it out and spread it over him. I wasn't as gentle as I thought I was, apparently, because he woke up and started crying. I raced out of the room so he wouldn't see me, but it was too late. I went back in and picked him up, and we sat in his recliner. He settled down immediately, and even let me cradle him. Just holding him like that touched my heart, and I started thinking about his first months of life and holding him in my arms. It reminded me of the book, "Love You Forever" (http://blogs.smarter.com/babieskids/category/books/) and made me wonder if I would be sneaking into his room to hold him when he gets bigger than me...

While I was holding him, lost in my own thoughts, his eyes fluttered open and fixed on something above my head. I looked up to see what had him so interested, even half-asleep, and saw the green light on the smoke detector. Why this caught his gaze, I do not know, but when I looked back down at him, he gave me a sweet, secret-sharing smile that melted me all the way down to my toes. His little dreamy eyes glanced back up at the light, and when I looked again, he gave another smile. I started laughing, and he just griiiiiiiiinned at me.

Sound silly to you? It was the most beautiful thing I had experienced all day. That smile was worth five hours of labor, nights of little or no sleep, days running on pure caffeine, and so much more. That child wrapped heartstrings so tightly last night; even when I thought they couldn't get any stronger. Motherhood is not only the most rewarding thing I've ever done; it's probably one of the only things that gets sweeter every single day, regardless.